John Quinones has written a book, Heroes Among Us.
If you seen John Quinones, either on Good Morning America or What Would You Do?, then you know that he talkes a lot about the psychology of how people react. Recently, he did a piece for GMA where he posed as a Migrant Worker being verbally abused by a restaurant employee. He did this in an attempt to see whether or not people would step in and intervene, or back off and let it happen. The results showed that there were people out there willing to step in and make a difference. To see that others are protected.
I haven't read his new book. I just found out about it this morning. But one of the things that he talked about in his interview on GMA was that women are more likely to step in and protect others. He said teenagers have a similar thought process, but that men lose this instinct as they mature. Very interesting. Twice now my daughter has stepped in and defended someone that she thought needed help. Twice she has put herelf on the line to protect those smaller, weaker, or just not as confident as herself. My first reaction was adrenhaline. Once I determined that she had not really put herself in danger I was okay. My second reaction was that I was proud of her. She had shown real caring and even leadership skills by stepping in to right wrongs. But I did have a third reaction. One of concern. Would there be long range effects from her actions? Would she alienate herself in order to protect others? Unfortunately, this is a very real threat. One that didn't happen.
But the interesting thing about this was that my husband sort of skipped the first few reactions and went right to the last. He felt she should have stayed out of the situation and let them defend themselves. He was worried that she would have put herself at danger just for someone else.
Is his reaction wrong or mine right? I don't think there is a wrong or right in this case. I think that you need to be true to yourself and your own ideals. What makes a hero? I write them and yet, everyday my notions are challenged. What do you think makes a hero?
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